Dear Mom

Happy Mother’s day to each and every one of you – to mothers and mothers to be. Last year this time, I had lost all hope of ever being a mother and tried to stop obsessing about being a mother and paid tribute to the moms in my life. I felt terrific after the post and maybe just a small spark of hope. Today it is a reality, I am a MOM. I feel like shouting from a roof top that I am a mom too. There are no words to describe how I feel when Ashwin smiles at me when I walk into the room when he wakes up or when I hold him in my arms and repeatedly tell myself,” this is real, he is here and he calls you amma”

This is a very emotional post for me and I might go all over the place, so bear with me here.  There are women who can easily become moms and then folks like us who have tried everything possible, be it the most superstitious of customs to advanced medical help. We become moms by the grace of other moms who have generously allowed us that esteemed position.

Dear Ashwin’s  Birth mom,

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving the gift of mother hood. I know you could have chosen an easy route, but you stayed strong and went through the arduous process of finding a perfect home for the little being that kicked you and played somersaults in your belly for 9 months.  We watch him grow and see hints of your personality in him. You welcomed us and my parents in to your home and gave us our first baby shower gifts as you wondered if friends will have time to host a baby shower for us. You let me touch your tummy and then took us to hospital visits to hear our baby’s heart beat.  Life moments that we may never have experienced, we did through you.   You smiled and went through the pain of labor and yet gave us the pleasure to hold him first. You gave Rajesh the opportunity to cut the umbilical cord, which was a surreal moment for him. You waited till we cried and held him before you did and that moment will be etched in my memory for ever. You whispered sweet nothings to him before you left the hospital and I hear you talk to him with your eyes when you visit. The love you have for him can never be expressed in words.  I cry as I write this and relive the moments of Ashwin’s birth. When you tell us how happy you are that he is a happy baby means more to us and than anything.  We enjoy your visits and the ease with which we all hang out is just simply awesome!!! A true sense of peace went through my soul when I lay in the hammock holding Ashwin while you helped Rajesh help us spruce up our backyard. A feeling of gratitude, immense happiness and most importantly peace. Always know we love you and will have nothing but great things to say about you to our lil munchkin.  Thank you  for being you.

Love Shankari

7 years ago


  1. you have me in tears..beautifully written. I think you and Rajesh have the best karma and Ashwin and the two of you were destined to be a family, he was just waiting for the right parents to come to him.
    Have a very special Mother’s Day Shankari.

  2. I have tears in my eyes, and a lump in my throat as I read this. Very evocative and heart-felt. Kudos to you, Rajesh, and Ashwin’s birth mom, for spreading and sharing the joys of parenthood. Have a very happy mother’s day!

  3. Just reading this I am in tears and S who is sitting and learning in the same room is asking me if I am ok. I am telling her that this time I am crying because of happiness reading a friends post about her beeing a mom.
    Hugs to you, Rajesh and the bith mom and also for the star in your life little Aswin.
    Have a wonderful and Happy Mothers day.

  4. A touching post! I am so very happy for you Shankari, Aswin is a very lucky child. Happy mothers day to you!

  5. Shankari…what a beautiful and heartfelt post…i have tears in my eyes when i am typing this. Happy Mothers Day to you…this is the first of a life time of mother’s day celebrations. Enjoy your day and your beautiful baby boy 🙂

  6. Shankari, you are one of the most special people I know. Your family’s love is an example for all to see that it is only through other people’s sacrifices that we experience authentic love, joy and peace and keep the flame of hope burning within us. Happy Mother’s Day Ama.

  7. I too am an adoptive mother and am most grateful for my children. I have open relationships with both birth mother’s and open adoption can be quite a beautiful thing. Your post is lovely and so joyful!

  8. Shankari

    I have tears in my eyes as I write this. You are a beautiful person and Ashwin is so lucky to have you as his Mom. God bless all of you.

  9. Shankari,
    Its been loong since I visited your blog and came in today to check if you have any updates on what little Ashwin is upto available for us. And what do I see? Wonderful wonderful post Shankari..Simply beautiful, as I kept reading for the first time itself, i had tears in my eyes..Little ashwin is simply lucky to have you and Rajesh for parents. Hugs to the cute baby and you too..God Bless the little pie!

  10. Shankari…. You are blessed…. in many ways. I’m happy for you, Ashwin, Rajesh and the birth mom. You are all blessed.


  11. Shankari… I have tears in my eyes as i read this.My Best wishes will always be with you, Rajesh and Ashwin. You are truly great! Ashwin is such a cutie-pie.
    May God bless you with all the happiness in the days to come. Lots of love!!!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *