Our Thanks on National Adoption Day

Today is National Adoption Day and this month we see a lot of posts from folks giving thanks for a bunch of reasons starting from thanks to starbucks to thanking their mom. My cousin thanked the chicken that was sacrificed for a scrumptious thanksgiving meal two years ago.

Every day of our lives for the last two years, we have thanked two souls who have given us the immense wealth of parenthood. Ashwin tugs my heart strings when he calls out to me in his sleep. The word amma means so much to me now than ever. Rajesh & I talk of Ashwin’s biological family often, they are our extended family. We continue to keep in touch with both of them. They are always eager to hear about Ashwin snippets. We email pictures and videos and call them on special occasions or just to say hi.

I have been meaning to write this for a very long time. Before we began our adoption journey, folks asked us why we would not go to India to adopt. We wanted our baby to know who his biological family is, we wanted him to be able to meet them or call them when he grows up if the circumstances allowed it, rather than take the route of closed adoption from the beginning.  When Ashwin had wheezing, we were able to make that quick call to ask if either of their family members have asthma. We called, and we got a response in 10 minutes. That to me is the joy of open adoption.

To all families that are waiting to adopt- Believe, Trust and most importantly be patient. Waiting is the most agonizing part of adoption. Waiting for that one call that will change our lives forever. When you meet your baby’s family- do so with an open heart.

We see glimpses of Rajesh & I in Ashwin. When he can distinguish cumin & fennel, it makes me so proud. You see Rajesh still asks me which one is fennel or cumin. He uses the word saute when I am sautéing onions. He is just like Rajesh when he brings the screw driver to the dryer, looks in and with a twinkle in his eyes, turns something and says, “ amma I fixed it”. He takes a camera and says, “smile, say cheese”. We know his diction is very good and know he got that from his birth mom. What a culmination of personalities!

Our thanks to everyone who supported us & helped during the times we lost hope, friends and family who prayed for us and listened when we needed to vent.

To all families that are waiting to adopt- Believe, Trust and most importantly be patient

5 years ago


  1. Thanks for this wonderful tribute. Today is Bob’s and my anniversary, so how perfect that it’s adoption day too. Our lives are so much richer for our relationship with Eva’s birth family.

  2. Shankari, Will it suffice if I say that I just want to see you in person in near future and give you a warm hug. I have no words to offer you, but just that one hug and hopefully it tells you the joy I feel for you. I am also grateful to you for showing me that life is not about things which average ppl stress about. Thank you. Tight hugs to that handsome dude who is growing up faster than I can fathom

  3. Such a lovely post…found you via the Folsom Indian Moms group that I started! Being a mom is the best thing that has happened to me….our second baby is just 2 months old, and I so wanted to adopt vs having my own, but I could not veto this decision so could not do it. You have a lovely website here, will browse for recipes!

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